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Category Programs & Programming
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| BASIC - A programming language. Related to certain social diseases in that those who have it will not admit it in polite company. Author Anon. | ||||
| I speak BASIC to clients, 1-2-3 to management, and mumble to myself. Author Anon. | ||||
| Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand. Author Anon. | ||||
| Optimization hinders evolution. Author Anon. | ||||
| The best book on programming for the layman is Alice in Wonderland; but that's because it's the best book on anything for layman. Author Anon. | ||||
| Pascal keeps your hand tied. C gives you enough rope to hang yourself. Author Anon. | ||||
| A program is a spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages. Author Anon. | ||||
| Real programmers don't work from 9 to 5. If any real programmers are around at 9am it's because they were up all night. Author Anon. | ||||
| Real programmers don't write in PL/I. PL/I is for programmers who can't decide whether to write in COBOL or FORTRAN. Author Anon. | ||||
| There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works. Author Anon. | ||||
| f u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgmmng. Author Anon. | ||||
| Old programmers never die. They just branch out to a new address. Author Anon. | ||||
| Old programmers never die. They just can't C as well. Author Anon. | ||||
| C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot. C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. Author Bjarne Stroustrup | ||||
| There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult. Author C.A.R. Hoare | ||||
| As a rule, software systems do not work well until they have been used, and have failed repeatedly, in real applications. Author Dave Parnas | ||||
| Don't get suckered in by the comments ... they can terribly be misleading. Author Dave Storer | ||||
| A crash is when your competitor's program dies. When your program dies, it is an 'idiosyncrasy'. Frequently, crashes are followed with a message like 'ID 02'. 'ID' is an abbreviation for idiosyncrasy and the number that follows indicates how many more months of testing the product should have had. Author Guy Kawasaki | ||||
| If we can dispel the delusion that learning about computers should be an activity of fiddling with array indexes and worrying whether X is an integer or a real number, we can begin to focus on programming as a source of ideas. Author Harold Abelson | ||||
| Programming graphics in X is like finding the square root of PI using Roman numerals. Author Henry Spencer | ||||
| A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that worked. Author John Gall | ||||
| He who hasn't hacked assemply language as a youth has no heart. He who does as an adult has no brain. Author John Moore | ||||
| The computer programmer is a creator of universes for which he alone is responsible. Universes of virtually unlimited complexity can be created in the form of computer programs. Author Joseph Weizenbaum | ||||
| Perl - The only language that looks the same before and after RSA encryption. Author Keith Bostic | ||||
| Real programmers can write assembly code in any language. Author Larry Wall | ||||
| Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers. Author Leonard Brandwein | ||||
| If you're masochistic enough to program in ADA, we're not going to stop you. Author Matt Welsh | ||||
| Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. Author Michael Sinz | ||||
| Real programmers are those that can sleep in front of terminals ... with their eyes opened. Author ricS | ||||
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